Is traditional dating/courting a myth in the present day?

Dating in the traditional sense is not a myth and is definitely not dead. Its just no longer a requirement in a lot of circles of men and women. I talk to women all the time about this very topic and the number one question is "Why doesn't he want to take me out?".

To understand why men don't have the desire or the need to plan dates, take you out, etc., you have have to understand the way a man's mind works. We are programmed to do what has worked before and if we need to alter it we will do it out of necessity. For example, if I dated ten women and they all liked their hand rubbed, when I meet you the first thing I'm gonna try is to rub your hand. The same applies with this topic to a certain extent. To understand why the man reacts this way you have to understand the other side as well.

Over time a lot of women have dealt with men that did not treat them well, wasn't right for them, didn't meet their standards...etc. So you choose not to deal with them. The unfortunate result or side effect of that is that your are alone. No matter how cocky or independent you are as a woman, sometimes you will get lonely. So out of need, sometimes you relax your standards just to fulfill that desire for companionship. In most cases that means settling for less because the dating pool is so shallow based on your experiences.

Now with the lowered standards instead of requiring that a man take you out in order to take steps to get to know you, you settle for the "You can come over to my house and watch DVD's" man. When you say yes to this, you now have set the standard for what you will receive later. Using the point that I illustrated earlier in the blog, the male side of this should become pretty clear. If I run into 20 women that accept me not courting them or taking them on dates....guess what??? When I meet you, I have to assume that you might want the same.

When the man approaches you with that, YOU as the person responsible for your ultimate happiness owe it to yourself to shut him down. If you let your desire for companionship overshadow what you know you need from him, you will always receive less than favorable results in the end. Sure you can go chill with a guy at his house and watch movies, but if this is how he courts you from day one, don't be surprised if a date doesn't follow.

The ultimate answer to the question ""Is dating a myth?" is NO, but it can be if we allow it to be. If we demand more, we will receive more, and if we don't receive it we have to learn to be happy without it. Settling should never be an option.